195 - Forum Diplomacy Steel Rex

[mafmiller]

DA-RA

Wise Wanderer, Valiant Voyager!

Your reply was most welcome in the Onyx Court! That you took the actions you did against my predecessor is understandable. In compensation for the anxiety that was caused you, and in hope of promoting a lasting peace, we recall our prince from his post in your town immediately and release all claim on the charming fishing port. The prince will be awarded the village in our Imperium in exchange, as outlined in our first missive.

May the Hearty Heroes of the West and the Noble Drow forever travel together!

Roris Rex
Great Imperator of the Drow

[Thudargh]

DW-UN

Master of Shadows,

I wish for there to be lasting peace between our kingdoms and hope you'll consider this offer well. I offer you the occupation of a town and village in the Mountains from turn ten until the earliest of turn 15 or when you've met your early strategic objectives. This is in addition to the permanent protection of your town in the Mountains. My asking price takes into consideration the considerable benefit you stand to gain from this arrangement. My requested conditions are:

1. A unilateral transfer of gold and food in the amount of the PC's production each turn you receive production from my PCs, which will require an ally declaration. You'll declare me neutral at the time I reoccoupy the PCs, or immediately upon my request.
   
2. Starting on turn 10 you'll initiate a standing order to have a L5+ agent or fanatic in the mountains guard the 1DW. The cost of this ongoing protection shall be borne by the Underworld. You may escape this obligation at any time, including up front, by paying 20k gold.
   
3. You offer your solemn oath that for the remainder of this struggle the agents of the Underworld shall not take any actions against the Dwarf, including against emissaries, PCs, groups, etc.
   
4. You also agree to respect the sovereignty of the Talking Mountains and to not attack me there at any time for any reason.
   
5. You won't share any details of my kingdom, including PC locations, emissary info, group locations, etc. with any other kingdom.
   
6. The above three conditions are void if for any reason I take a hostile action against you, excepting any actions I may take to reoccupy my town or village.
   
7. Lastly, I'll offer you an option to retain your status in the mountains permanently and to keep those PCs and their production. If you transfer to me one artifact of excellent quality of better you may keep the town and village and will no longer be obliged to transfer the production of those PCs.
   

What say ye?

With honor,

King Oban

(UN -> DW)
Great King of the Dwarves,

I'm afraid I must decline your offer.  Conditions 3 & 5 are not acceptable due to their indeterminate duration.  You are essentially requesting that I forgo any future enemies of your kingdom as potential customers for all time.  That is a great deal of lost opportunity - certainly more than the opportunities uncovered by my scribes.

I do appreciate your consideration.  Perhaps we will find other opportunities of mutual benefit in the future.

Shadow Master of the Underworld  

[Jumpingfist]

GI ----> AN

Hail ancient Consuls.  As you know we are trying to consolidate our new lands and we have arrangements for the BL to own the city and an additional town, the GN to own a village and the AN to own both a Town and a Village in Arcania.

I am wondering if there is some sum of gold or other favor that would be worth allowing the GI to own your town.  Even owning your village instead would give us a little extra security from would be attackers.  If you prefer to keep them both then let it be so.  We thought only to offer to learn if a mutually beneficial arrangement could be reached.

We understand the need to have more census.   We believe the mighty GI troops can protect the great seal located in that town.  Perhaps we could part with it if you would agree to pay the average of the years monthly income to us in a standing trade order.   The village we would like to keep as the food during winter is very useful.

[HeadHoncho]

GI -----> GN

Gnome king we owe you a debt for your help feeding our troops last turn.  I intend to pay back in gold at least the balance your forsook (the 8:1 will be remedied to at least 3:1) either this turn or next.

GN-GI

Great King Stonethrower,

Your friendship is truly sufficient, but only if it would make you feel better, we would take the balance the month after this one, as our King is temporarily away and unable to make the arrangements this month.

Again, however, only if you truly want to!

Best,
Bottlenose, for the Gnomes

[Netstrider]

WA -> DA

Hail King of the Elves With Darker Skin!

We have heard of the changing of the guard in your kingdom and wish to correct the oversight of not sending a diplomatic mission. We desire only peace so that we sit in our Ivory Towers weaving spells of no consequence whatsoever to anyone but ourselves. Mostly, though, we are trying to figure out how to make our penises burst into flames without otherwise injuring the body. It seems that something the Troll Chief No Fart said really caught the imagination of the High Red Mage. No one is getting much sleep around these days, that I can tell you. And all the screaming! All night long....

TMI?

Let me know if you also desire peace and how many turns of the moon you are willing to pledge to that effect.

Peace,
Red ("Torch Pecker")

[Drogo]

GI ----> AN

We can agree to paying a standing order for the production of the town in Arcania.  Our only request is that since we must declare you an Ally to accomplish this we would like you to do the same (no hurry but when your king has the free time).  I know there is some concern about the over proliferation of peace treaties so if you are more comfortable maintaining Ally status with the stipulation that either of us can change this status with two months notice that would be fine as well.  Please let us know the amount of the Town production and we can arrange to issue the order.

Also, do you have any currently diplomats at that town?  We might like to take it with our military to blood our troops.

[mafmiller]

DA-WA

The Imperator reads the red scroll as he reclines at table, dining on rare delicacies and surrounded by his nymphs and dryads. His favorite, Nimowe, kneels behind him, reading over his shoulder and giggles. He responds in mock anger ...
Nimowe, burning penises are not amusing!

Mysterious Mage,
Your greetings are well received. We have no intention of ever disturbing the fascinating research of one so wise and learned. If you must have a NAP to placate your people, so be it. Name the span and to it, we agree.
May your endeavors be fruitful,
The Great Imperator of the Drow

[mafmiller]

... oh, one more thing ...
the Drow are not elves with darker skin ... elves are Drow with lighter skin.

[Netstrider]

WA -> DA

Hail Imperator of the VERY confusingly named Elven kingdom!

Thank you for considering a NAP with our kingdom. We propose a NAP until this time the following year. Which I think is 12 "turns" as the muggles call a certain span of time. Although I'm not really sure on that as my astronomers haven't really briefed me as thoroughly as they should have. But 12 "turns" is what I mean.

I fully expect that if nothing uneventful happens we should be able to extend that NAP next year.

Sincerely,
Red

[DuPont]

TR-AN
Big Chief No Fart was ranting at his poor hapless advisory, Noxious Vapus again. "You bad at math! You can't count!" Noxious Vapus sighed. He didn't think the king could count higher than 21 since that was the number of appendages he had sticking off of his body.
"Sometimes the numbers just don't work out, Big Chief," he said.
"But me want to be Big Chief of Torvale! I take the towns and villages you say and the peasants still not admit I am Big Chief! We look everywhere - no more villages!"
"It may be that we missed one somewhere, my King," he said. "Perhaps somewhere in the deep south."
"That be land of the Old Men. Tell Old Men we take their village in the north. If we do this and unknown village in south proclaims us Big Chief as well, we tell Old Men and they have village. But our deal means we get to be Big Chief of Trovale."
Noxious Vapus wasn't sure how the Consuls would react to this latest missive from his King, but he went about to draft it. Pointing out that the Trolls had been quite generous in their split, he apologized for having to nab one village back but with Spring coming, the Troll kingdom really did need control of the region. All the same, he sent out another order to the troop to be on standby. Just in case the response was less than accepting.